With Love

Love you Ma
           Love you Pa
           Love you Bro
  Can't forget you G'mas -you'll forever be missed, wont be a day ill forget about you, that is
  if I don't have Alzhiemers ;)
      Aunties! how are you doing? Your little niece missed your cooking skills! you should
      come live with me. how could I be so ignorant to the love and care you give to me? I'm
      sorry, now I understand
          Dodo Thongdum, wonder what you are doing? where are you guys now, hope you 
          are doing well!
Mill stay strong, although school is hard on you, you gotta fight and move on. I know you can do it, and you'll be successful at that too. Try your best and God will do the rest!
    How come I am so sick and tired of this world? Why was I ever born? What can I do with
    my life to help others? would it be fine it I missed a few days of school to enjoy my life
    back home?
THAILAND I really missed you <3

I missed ไทยแลนด์

It has not been even a year yet and I am already craving to go back home, and why is that? Wonder what made me decide to come here in the first place. Was I misinformed, or its just that I was not ready for this. Why, when they were saying how I could not survive the life condition here, living alone at such a young age, but still, I was strong headed and persist in coming. Was it out of jealousy? Probably. Me back then just want to be better than anyone, and seeing my friends sent off  to study abroad, I was compelled to go too. Curiosity? That's more like it. Me who have never travel anywhere far before, the me who loved adventures and new surroundings. Well, I still do in any case. I remember that first, and last, hiking trip that I took back in NZ: it was once in a life time. The natural world was just so pretty that I was taken awestruck. Quite a scene. Everything just slowly immerse in my brain, washing away all those worries and pain. I really miss the place--where was it again? I believed it is called greenstone valley, situated right on the wakatipu lake. One day, I'll be back. Thank you so much Ms. Strang, I'm too ashamed to go see you right now but I really do hope you are doing well. I will go find you one day!

Tragic Flaw- more like a typical human's flaw

Conclusion: no human is 100 percent perfect

It is extremely easy to see flaws in others than in yourself. The same  goes with me. This is will be contributed to my own character flaw that I know or suspect of. Of course, some would unintentionally be overlook; I am also a human.

-Impatience: I really do hope to overcome with this, since it occasionally scare the crap out of my friend. I am a very impatient person; it can pisses me off easily if something is taking a little too long than it should. I should be calmer, as I will be reaching adulthood soon. If I won't , it is really going to interfere with my relationships.

-Indecisiveness: One of my worst character. I can not make a sudden decision and would at least have to take some time for consideration. It is annoying at times since I have to back out at plans last minute. I am a person who rarely dare to refuse anyone, from fear of aggravating them. I wish I could stand on my point more.

-Self-confident: This is not a frequent visitor, sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. When I really need it most, it just disappears into thin air. When I should not be so confident, it gets me into trouble. Why? I do not know. I wish I could be more outgoing and more strong willed in some parts while being as gentle and flexible as grass in the wind. Be more OUT-FORTH on my feelings!

-Worrying too much: Sometimes I wish I would not have to think as much as I do. It's just only increasing my stress level and does no good to me at all. Brain! just stop calculating for a moment. Hearts! Guts! you guys ought to do more work, know that right?

-Anger Management: I really need to get into that class although I might say I improve a lot since I was a kid. When I was young, I would just lose my head and start attacking my brother, so much of cute little sis, eh? Still, I get aggravated easily at times; there must be something I can do to let go of that anger, because I certainly can not hold back :)

-Imagination: Let your imagination run wild, right? NO! But, of course, I did. :P I'm wasting time thinking of things that might have or may never have happen. why? because I can. nonono, I don't want to be an airhead, thinking of nothing but the impossibles, let me live in the world of reality, at least for a while.

International Week

Every year at our school, the student leadership club would host the so called "international week"  event where the members would try to represent their assigned "country". The thing is, the members of SLC are not international students, and hardly anyone in the club has kept a close contact with international students. Most of them are Caucasians whom interests would , not in a million years, involve country relations or European culture. More than half dont know where Colombia is, and hardly anyone could tell a difference between Thailand and Taiwan. I always question every time the event was held: why bother? Why are you doing this while at the same time, the twelve dozens of international kids were being ignored? Are you trying to promote the importance of each country or what? What you guys did, was going right ahead with the idea, without ever having consulted with an international student; the only person who you guys talk to was the "international" head consultant, who is really caucasian, bestown his position after having stay at ONE of those country. International, my ass. And while the Chinese kids were trying to give some ideas of what they might like to see on the dishes, what did they do? They completely ignored them, saying its way to hard to make and that the ingredient is hard to find. So what did they do? They look up these "international" recipes online, which to the foreign kids are merely westernized rubbish food. What I really want to say is, what is the point of having the international week when the kids were ignored and no one really care what they think.  this is so disappointing coming from a school receiving hundred of thousands of money from these poor kids.

Note

the purpose of this blog is mainly for self-indulgence.
This is not design to be creative, exceptional, inspiring, or anything

this blog is my secret getaway place for times when I feel the need to speak out-forth things I could not, or should not, or when I feel the need top express my feelings, when there is no one to listen to.

I hope that by doing this, I will be able to keep myself sane and not having to worry about hurting anyone's feeling. It will give me the peace of my mind